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Tom-Joad

Blessed by Bruce

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22 minutes ago, Paolo's Circus Story said:

I'm taking this as confirmation that the LINYC version of "The River" is class despite the criticism. 

Great post, I hope your son is okay and stays healthy. 

It’s a beautiful piece of music. Never understood the criticism.

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There shouldn't be any criticism toward that gem of a stunner, nada, zilcho.  

Tom-Joad, sorry to read you've been going through some struggles recently, it sucks to have to do a job that feels like we're watching the washing machine spin all day.  But, so glad to read also how much you're enjoying fatherhood and your precious baby boy.  

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8 hours ago, Tom-Joad said:

There is nothing quite as harrowing as having a sick child and not being able to do anything about it. The past few months had been rough. A wave of depression and anxiety had hit and caught me off guard, alone in a country that’s not my own and was feeling less so by the minute.

Away from what I would call home, faced with hardships I’d hardly ever imagined, forced to do monotonous, dumb, repetitive, alienating jobs. 

All my dreams had been crushed and I knew very well it had all been my fault. There’s no easy way to live with this. It’s the sort of thing that can crush you unless you’re lucky. So I stripped away everything and tried to keep the very minimum, the essentials of what still could make me happy.

It was family. 

I saw myself as part of something else, I realised we’re animals and there’s nothing that makes you happier than holding your naked baby against your naked chest, wiping his snot, smiling as he bites your nose, as he scratches you when over-excitedly he waves his hands and laughs at your silly face.

When he became sick a few days ago it wasn’t anything serious but I was struck at how connected I was to that person, how infuriating it was to be powerless as he cried in pain. 

He woke up a lot that night and one of those times he started crying so much, I just held him and tried to calm him down. He wouldn’t. I tried everything and he still wouldn’t. That’s when I thought I’d play some music on my phone because that always helps him calm down. Clarence came through the dark of the bedroom with those lonely, beautiful notes in the intro to The River on Live in NYC. His crying started to fade away as he stared at me, my face lit by the glow of the mobile phone, and he just stood there listening. The electric piano, the harmonica, that voice... That beautiful piece of music now had a place in this very basic, animalistic, primitive relationship. It belonged there and I rejoiced as he let the music soothe him. He was sleeping by the time it finished and I just enjoyed watching him looking so calm, cheek against my arm, blessed by Bruce.

I love you, man.

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TJ.

 

This too shall pass.

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Im sorry the wee fella hasn't got a nanna living close by

I hope he's feeling better soon

That's really lovelly the LINYC river had that effect on him 

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Oh TJ, I want to give you all a big hug. I truly hope that little Daniel will soon be feeling better and that the future will look brighter for all of you.

Tomorrow there will be sunshine, I just don't know when tomorrow will come.

Stay strong my friend.

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I love everything about your post, except of course your son being sick a  lot. It's nature testing your fatherly love and compassion...

What helped me through many nights like yours, was the realization that everything miraculously turns for the better once the sun comes out. 
 

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The other thing I should have said is that this is not all your fault. It isn't your fault that you no longer feel welcome in this country or that you are struggling to find interesting and fulfilling work.

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2 hours ago, whispered secret said:

The other thing I should have said is that this is not all your fault. It isn't your fault that you no longer feel welcome in this country or that you are struggling to find interesting and fulfilling work.

Took the words right out of my mouth.  

TJ, that first beautiful post brought tears to my eyes.  I hope your son continues to feel better; and that there are happier days ahead for you and your family. 

Sending much love from NJ.  

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15 hours ago, Tom-Joad said:

It’s a beautiful piece of music. Never understood the criticism.

I never cared for it.....But there is no way i am arguing with your precious child. Beautiful heartfelt post.

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12 hours ago, Tom-Joad said:

31497B7C-2853-4EAD-BE38-30189D60175F.thumb.jpeg.badda6d717c79ddeaf1591031130129a.jpeg

With respect to Bruce fandom, this may be one of the cutest, most adorable pics I've ever seen.

Priceless.  

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Ive missed you TJ

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33 minutes ago, Tom-Joad said:

It’s been a while, hasn’t it?

Yes 

But sometimes its good to have a wee vreak but don't forget even though mist of us dpnt live in Scotland you have plenty of Bruce friends here 

 

Has your avitar picture changed?

I finally dragged  by laptop out of the drawer and got to see greasy lake not on my phone for the first time in a couple of years, and you look different ?

...my laptop is now doing updates for Africa :lol:

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1 hour ago, Daisey Jeep said:

Yes 

But sometimes its good to have a wee vreak but don't forget even though mist of us dpnt live in Scotland you have plenty of Bruce friends here 

 

Has your avitar picture changed?

I finally dragged  by laptop out of the drawer and got to see greasy lake not on my phone for the first time in a couple of years, and you look different ?

...my laptop is now doing updates for Africa :lol:

I’ve had the same picture for a good few years! :) A pair of binoculars for rent from when I sat at the very last row to see Phantom of the Opera.

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7 hours ago, Tom-Joad said:

I’ve had the same picture for a good few years! :) A pair of binoculars for rent from when I sat at the very last row to see Phantom of the Opera.

I always wondered what that was. I hope both you and your son are soon on the mend. Nice to see you back here by the way.

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Beautiful story.

I don't want to hijack the thread and my story isn't Bruce related but it's along the same lines. As I've mentioned on here before, I have a little girl who's 4 years old now. She was born in my early twenties. Her mother and I have a very turbulent relationship where we've had to go through family courts so I can see my girl after attempts made to stop us from having a father/daughter relationship now. 

After a couple years of only having her for hours every week I now have her for the whole weekend every other week. Asides from Bruce, I'm also a huge fan of Elvis Presley. And recently when my daughter was with me I was playing some Elvis songs through my speaker whilst getting her dressed in the morning. She started dancing. I started dancing. She asked what was happening. I says, this is Elvis Presley and he has this effect on us. 

I've then shown her pictures and videos of Elvis and she's realised he plays guitar. Like daddy. And she's realised he has a quiff. Like daddy. Infact now on a very rare occasion if I pick her up from her mum's and my hair isn't styled, she'll tell me off and tell me to get back "the Elvis hair". My daughter's name is quite similar to Elvis actually and her middle name is Marie, so her name isn't too distant of Elvis' daughter Lisa-Marie. 

One day she drew a picture of Elvis and asked me to take a picture of it to send to him. It was funny that she thought I had Elvis' number but I didn't know how to explain to her that Elvis died so long ago that Daddy's mum was only a little girl when it happened. But I decided to just tell her I've sent it and we're just waiting on Elvis responding with his blessing.

The other weekend my 4 year old actually asked me to teach her how to put an actual record on my turntable and she plays Jailhouse Rock on repeat. And the following weekend I had her, we also had a visit from her cousin who is the same age. We go to the supermarket to get some things and suddenly my daughter asks her cousin if she likes Lisa Marie Presley. I found that so funny, that a four year old even knows who that is (I know I taught her but still), funny that she just assumes every other 4 year old would also know who Lisa Marie Presley is and even funnier that she didn't even ask her about Elvis.

Anyhow, I rambled on a bit there but your lovely story just reminded me of the sheer happiness I feel when I see my girl dancing to Jailhouse Rock.

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1 hour ago, -Sussudio- said:

was funny that she thought I had Elvis' number but I didn't know how to explain to her that Elvis died so long ago that Daddy's mum was only a little girl when it happened. 

You have to come up with a plan how to explain to her that Elvis is dead. She has to hear it from you, before she hears it from someone else. Same with Santa.

Yes indeed, sir, children are a gift... :)

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